Vetnews | Augustus 2024 36 « BACK TO CONTENTS I hope this article finds you and your families well and safe!!! Last month we discussed empathy, defining it and becoming aware that there are different types. In addition, I shared some tips with you on how to go about developing your sense of empathy. In this month’s edition, I would like to explore how we connect in person with other people! One of the ultimate references for people skills and connecting with people for me personally has always been Dale Carnegie’s book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People”. On the other hand, I have met a lot of people who have never read the book or even heard of its author yet have an amazing ability to connect with people they meet. This article is inspired by one such person I observed yesterday, working in a restaurant, and making an incredible connection that brought tears to my eyes. Why is it that some people seem to build instant rapport with almost anyone they come across, while others are left with a network of one? The following is what I noticed yesterday in that interaction between two people: 1. Sincerity. There was no mistaking it, but the interaction I witnessed was as genuine as they come. Despite these two individuals not being related or not being friends, it was a connection that both individuals truly cared about, and it was evident in their eyes. They were strangers, yet they spoke like father and son to one another. 2. Memorable. The person I was observing is someone who has been working in the restaurant and hospitality industry for more than 20 years. People that have met him that far back still remember him and he remembers them and their names. Among all these interactions are birthday wishes, and respect for each other’s cultures and customs. Perhaps, the most unforgettable may be genuine acts of kindness and helpfulness. I would go as far as to say that being memorable isn’t as hard as we think! 3. Networking. Even powerful people in the world have something they’d like help with, and most never reach out to those above them due to the fear that they wouldn’t be able to offer anything in return. We, on the other hand, have more to offer than we realize: sharing their project with the community; and offering to spread their message. Give real thought to who you could connect them with to benefit their goals. If it turns out you can’t be that helpful, the gesture alone will stand out because it shows you care. Furthermore, consider that most job openings are filled through networking and referrals, and making connections is no different. You automatically arrive with credibility when referred to someone you want to meet by a mutual friend. That fact means nothing, but in the world of social dynamics, it’s gold! Spend more time connecting with your current network of friends and colleagues and see where it leads. 4. Pay attention. It’s impossible to genuinely offer help if you don’t pay attention. Learn about their backgrounds and passions. Invest genuine time in learning what really matters to them and how you can help. Make real friends. Think about how you’ve made the friends you have. That’s all this is. You only make friends with people you genuinely want in your life. The same rule should go for bigger-name connections. Don’t overthink it. Be human, be helpful and most humans will happily be human in return, regardless of who they are. One thing I can guarantee, the man I was observing pays attention and has helped many, many people in his time. In return, the people that he has helped, continue to come through for him when he needs assistance with something. 5. Be consistent. The first attempt is just the very beginning. Realize that the first try may get you nowhere, but the fifth or the tenth tries are the ones that start to yield connections. An unresponsive or poorly responsive person doesn’t mean they don’t want to connect with you. Remain persistent and make sure to follow up the next time an opportunity presents itself. Don’t be in a hurry, but don’t be invisible either. The protagonist of this article has never been invisible, is persistent and unavoidable. It all comes back to helping others. If you spend 100 per cent of your waking hours thinking about how you can help absolutely everyone you come in contact with - from the barista who makes your latte, to the top authority in your industry - you will find everything else tends to take care of itself. The world will suddenly be in your corner. Next month, we will continue looking at more ideas for improving our quality of life and overall performance both at work and at home. v Influential Life Coaching CONNECTING PERSON TO PERSON Dr Mats Abatzidis B.Sc. B.V.Sc. New Insights Certified VIP Life Coach mats.abatzidis@yahoo.co.za Founder of Influential Life Coaching http://www.matsaba.wix.com/drmatscoach Author of the published book “Life outside your comfort zone. Better and beyond all expectations”. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=searchalias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=Abatzidis http://www.life-coach-directory.co.za/mats-abatzidis Vet's Health I Life Coaching
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