Vetnuus | Desember 2023 38 « BACK TO CONTENTS I hope this article finds you and your families well and safe!!! Last month we discussed the concept of “thinking outside the box”. We sometimes find ourselves in challenging circumstances and engaging in creative thinking and being innovative may offer solutions that may be missed otherwise. This month we look at friendship, keeping communication lines open, making choices and a life lesson that can be taken out of it for everyone! Here is a tale to demonstrate the lesson: Once upon a time, there were two friends. Their names were John and Steven. They had met at their place of work. It was an interesting beginning to their friendship after working late into the afternoon and meeting in the office only to have John share a very deep concern with his newfound friend. Since that day, every day shared between them has been special, insightful, rewarding and fulfilling. After a few years of sharing and growth came a day when John was celebrating his birthday. Steven forgot about his birthday and went on about his daily routine without wishing John a happy birthday. Suddenly there was a quiet period of a couple of a few weeks between them. There was significantly less interaction and as time went on, some doubt crept into the relationship. Steven was not sure what was happening and why things changed and decided to approach John and ask him if everything was okay. Upon expressing his hurt feelings for having his birthday forgotten Steven, surprisingly lashed out and started adding hurtful comments to the discussion. John was made to feel bad for being childish and expecting people to wish him happy birthday since he was no longer a child. John didn’t react to this and silently left the office. John would continue greeting Steven every morning, politely upon arrival to the office. A month later, John’s father was having a party at their home, and he told John that he was welcome to invite a few of his friends over to join them. John invited a few friends and included Steven on that list. Steven was rather surprised by the invitation and despite not having spoken with John a lot, decided that he would go to the party and honour the invitation. After spending some time socialising amongst all the guests, John ended up sitting around with all his friends by the veranda, including Steven. Somehow, the conversation revolved around various professions and especially around all the negative aspects of dealing with those service providers. Pretty soon, without any obvious prompting, Steven’s profession was being discussed and starting to make him look really bad. John stepped in and defended Steven’s profession with particular emphasis on how compassionate people like Steven are. He spoke for a while and defended every challenge from his friends. Everyone backed off eventually and John’s defence seemed more than adequate amongst the silence. Steven approached John after a while and seemed very confused. He asked John to speak in private and they isolated themselves in a separate room on the one end of the house. Steven started speaking once the door was closed - “When I said all those mean things to you after your birthday, you didn’t complain to anyone, but when your friends started badmouthing my profession, you single-handedly defended me against everyone. I don’t understand why you did that despite me being so rude to you not so long ago. You had no obligation to defend me”. John considered what Steven had to say in silence. John was visibly calm and making sure that the words he was about to utter would be meaningful – “Good vibes should always be spread amongst us all so that people can learn and also do good deeds.” After Steven heard his friend’s answer, he was shocked, right down to his core. Steven apologised for being so rude to John after his birthday. What followed thereafter was only going to contribute towards their friendship growing stronger. John had a choice between allowing Steven’s words to influence him negatively or rather to focus on other more positive attributes of his friend, as well as the well-being of their friendship overall. John also made the choice to keep the communication lines open and not let a single event dictate the fate of their friendship. Next month, we will continue looking at more ideas for improving our quality of life and overall performance both at work and at home. v Influential Life Coaching THE TWO FRIENDS Dr Mats Abatzidis B.Sc. B.V.Sc. New Insights Certified VIP Life Coach mats.abatzidis@yahoo.co.za Founder of Influential Life Coaching http://www.matsaba.wix.com/drmatscoach Author of the published book “Life outside your comfort zone. Better and beyond all expectations”. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=searchalias%3Ddigital-text&field-keywords=Abatzidis http://www.life-coach-directory.co.za/mats-abatzidis Vet's Health I Life Coaching
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